I know I've told you this story before, I know that it will be about 12 months since I told it, but I'll tell it again, because it fascinates me and hopefully you, and anyway, who knows, I may have a new reader since last year.

At any time of the year there are 20 acres of stubble available for birds on our rented land. The stubble stats its life exactly as is it is named, a sort of bristly designer stubble, but come spring it develops in to a luxurious beard. The beard consists largely of thistles, but it also contains all manner of weeds and grasses. It is left to its own devices until harvest time provides next year's stubble.

A week or so ago, we harvested 20 acres of wheat for what we call whole crop silage. We take the whole of the crop, straw and grain together, and make silage of it. The wheat grain is at a sort of soft "cheesy" stage when we cut it. Having done that, and thus provided the birds until next year's stubble, we can turn our attention to tidying up the mess that is last year's.

I take a topper to it, it now stands bonnet high to the tractor, and that's our biggest tractor! It's a slow dusty, dirty job, but I actually enjoy it. It's almost a unique environment of its own, and from my vantage point high up on the tractor, I'm looking down on to it.

I can see tracks in the weeds, some slight, some wide and obviously well used, often I can see where animals and birds have created shelter among the undergrowth.

I'm looking for the wildlife I disturb, wildlife pops out of the cover in front of me, it pops out to see what's going happening on the wide swathe I cut through earlier in the year, because there is a public footpath right through the middle of the field. I'm mostly seeing hares, big hares and little hares and tiny leverets that scamper away in their panic. Cock pheasants, but no hens that I can see. Here comes a rat! And just a few rabbits. I'm looking for a fox, this would be ideal cover for a fox to lie for the day, but there is so much other wildlife about I doubt if there's one there. Anyway the keeper has his pheasant poults in his rearing pens so I expect he's had a tidying up of the fox population.

There's a strong wind blowing and, as the wind eddies about, it moves grasses and weeds so that the movement tricks you in to thinking it's an animal you've disturbed.

There will still be plenty of cover for the smaller animals and birds when I've finished, because I'm cutting all this off about eight inches tall, so they will be able to hide beneath what I have cut off.

All I'm really doing is felling the thistles before the thistle down is blown around the parish. Anyway there's plenty of cover in the next field where we have the UK equivalent of a rainforest, a crop of maize.

But what's this? A different sort of track, a human size track leading at right angles to the public footpath. It goes about 50 yards from the public footpath until it reaches a trampled down bit about the size of a double bed. This is the love nest of the randy rambler, unfortunately unoccupied, I've got no issues there but I suspect that if it was me I could have hound a better place – wouldn't want to be running about in all those thistles without any knickers on. I could cut around it and leave it for future use but I cut right through it. Not for me to encourage illicit liaisons, they can't be married can they?

Maize, as a plant, is the most vigorous plant I grow. On warm days in July you can almost hear it growing; you can certainly see the difference from day to day.

But it's also the most vulnerable plant to competition. It doesn't like weeds and can't or won't compete with them. It doesn't like the shade that comes on it once a day from that tree on the other side of the road. There's a fair patch by the gate in one of my fields where it doesn't like it because it's pale and yellow and half the height it should be.

If you go into maize, it will snap off at the slightest touch. Ramblers who insist on walking side by side in maize are good at snapping off. But all of these issues are nothing compared with cattle getting in there, and the cattle are nothing at all compared with sheep. So you live in dread of that... but it does happen.

I fetched my neighbours heifers out of his maize one Sunday afternoon while he was tied up milking and he was so grateful that his girlfriend bought me a curry and gave me such a big kiss that I might let them in there myself next week.

Sometimes the maize is so tall that you can't see cattle in there so you just have to leave the gate open and hope they will come out of their own accord when they get bored.

My 22 dry cows have just spent a night in the maize. The hunt were out exercising hounds (you don't say the hounds), hounds had had enough of exercising and decided to go hunting. It was a bit of a panic getting them back together apparently and gates were left open everywhere. So my gates were left open and the cows were in the maize and so far there is no apology, no curry and no kiss.

Next time I go to the kennels they will be told all about it. Woe betide them if I'm in a bad mood.