The recession has produced some wonderful doublespeak, but none to beat our local posh greengrocer's announcement that, because he had been so successful, he was closing the business down.

He shut up his shop, which sold fiendishly expensive fruit and veg so exotic that most of us had never heard of it, because he was going to concentrate on selling wholesale to top chefs all over the world, he said. Dream on, we thought.

More recession spin comes from the British Council who are cutting down their operation in Egypt "in order to deliver improved methods that are not premises based." In other words we can't afford to stay there any more.

Likewise, there are the bank branches which close down in order to give you a better service, the staff cuts that are part of on-going rationalisation, to improve our delivery.

We're all being bamboozled by double talk, and we're not taken in by it.

I'd far rather firms said 'look, times are hard, we can't afford to run this service any more, sorry', that banks and building societies said 'we know this is a rotten interest rate, bear with us', instead of announcing a brilliant flashily named savings deal that boils down to you being trapped in it for a year while it earns you peanuts.

Politicians are being urged to come clean, and business should follow suit, and stop disguising bad news with weasel words.