I am 16 years old, and it is the summer before I start sixth form.

My hair is a matted mess, my welly-clad feet are aching and I have not seen my reflection in four days. This, of course, is Glastonbury, where the rules have changed for just a few days in June. I am allowed to be dirty and eat custard creams for breakfast, and I have no choice but to queue 10 minutes to visit a toilet. Am I happy? I am in heaven – but I also know that I am tired, and hot, and I miss my bed just a little bit.

To define a typical teenager is as fruitless a task as defining a typical human. We are often unrecognisable to one another, and the division between peers can be as broad as that between adolescents and adults. Yet in today's society there is the growing burden on young people to always be having a 'good' time. So are we? The rising number of our age group being diagnosed with psychological disorders suggests not, but in fact this tells us little. Sufferers of such issues are as difficult to label as anyone else in their peer group.

There is no absolute in teenagers. Between the moments of pure unadulterated pleasure we each experience feelings of discomfort, or panic, or irritation. I constantly ask myself whether the choices I make are the right ones. Am I wasting chances to be happy, or ignoring opportunities of a more exciting life? I perceive that those around me are having a simply incredible time, without worries, embarrassment or insecurity. But I know that this is simplistic, and untrue. So why am I unable to shake off this mounting pressure to be enjoying life? Perhaps because the demon on my shoulder is simply a version of me – however much I cannot stand reproach from others, it seems completely reasonable when the words are my own.

I have only ever wanted to be happy. As a child I thought that contentment could be found in one place, namely adolescence.

At 16 years old I have discovered this fantasy is decidedly unattainable. At first this seemed terribly unfair. Why could I not be happy all the time? I had tried to do everything right. But with indignation came an unexpected sense of relief. In an effort to be always having a good time, I had been moving in frustrated circles, trying to escape feelings I did not want and getting nowhere. It was only when I gave up trying so hard to be happy that I realised what it meant.

To be happy is to experience every emotion; whether you want to embrace it or you want to flee from it, to be happy you must let it become part of your self.

Am I happy?

Not yet.

Holly is in Year 12 at Colston's Girls School